External Events and Internal
Processes
I’ve been
collecting ideas for this blog over the past couple of weeks now but it seems
to me that something that lies at the heart of this theme has been on my mind for
quite a while. Alanna writes in her blog
about her teaching practices, and how she is finding her own practices (and her
own identity maybe?) in the world of possibilities. Ideas that hit me in her blog- ‘overlapping’,
‘multiple layers’, ‘non-linear’- could not take my attention away from the
first idea of ‘the binary’. This idea
seems somehow a block for me and it returned me to my own blog. We talked about external events and internal
processes at the beginning of the month as almost being in a dialogue, as if
they were two separate, clearly defined realities staring at each other across
a physical boundary. I find this way of
seeing troubling, particularly so, because the longer I look at it, the
stronger the image appears, even if my gut feeling is telling me that this is
not how I experience the world. And once
again it appears because it is almost impossible for me to conceive of myself as
anything other than separate and contained within the world I am experiencing.
For my
inquiry I’m looking at the dancers’ experience of music in the dance
studio. I set out in my Module 2
proposal to explore it through the lens of the ‘intersubjective’, what we
consider as ‘subjective’ experiences but that are formed out there in the
world, through participation. The
personal and the collective forming as one whole, but encompassing multiple,
overlapping experiences. And all of
these experiences are co-dependent.
We could see
music and/or dance as being at one and the same time both an external event and
an internal process with their origins not always clear. We can question the extent to which we can
see musicians as engaging in a complex and intimate dance, and dancers as
creating moving images out of the many rhythms and melodies they hear within
them. A rhythm is most certainly an
internal process as well as an external event and I would imagine most people
can conjure in their memories the magical sensation of when these realities
merge as one through dance.
These things
are very difficult to talk about (as I have found through my interviewing) or
write about as I am struggling now, but I feel they can been understood through
other mediums, such as dance, which does not necessarily rely on a binary in
order to define meaning. Sometimes the eagerness to define and understand can get in the way from me experiencing the overlapping realities of which I am apart of but nevertheless seem contradictory and confusing.